She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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