I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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