Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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