the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize