Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
