I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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