FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
