Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize