when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
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