as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
