I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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