omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize
