I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Randomize
