when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
