remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Randomize
