also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
