Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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