did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
