She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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