I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I love you. Go after that dick
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
