8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
