sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
