I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I think a kid would responsible me up
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
