Taylor Swift is so right about you.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
