If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
