Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(567): View more from Ohio

i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial

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(209): View more from California

what is college for if not random hookup sex?

(951): View more from California

learning.

(209): View more from California

i would literally fuck learning if i could.

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!

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(615): View more from Tennessee

How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.

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(613): View more from Ontario

I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."

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(206): View more from Washington

before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.

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(228): View more from Mississippi

I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids

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