dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
