got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
