Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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