Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
