$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I am available for nakedness
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
