do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
