saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
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