When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize