4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
