u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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