is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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