I heard we made out
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
