You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
