i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize