So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
