Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Randomize
