If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
You pole danced in your parka.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
