i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
