after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
COCAINE IS GR8
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
