is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
