I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Randomize
