My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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