great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
