Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Randomize
