there was a trapeze. enough said
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
it glows. i had to have it.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize