Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
